The most difficult part of communicating with others, and the one that most of us do not pay enough attention to, is listening to others. If you want to communicate well with others, with your wife or friends, you have to be a good listener. Let you know that listening is different from just hearing, although the difference is very simple.
Listening means that you only listen to sounds, but listening means
that you listen and understand well what the other person is saying. You may
think that you are listening to your wife well, while you are listening to her
and not paying attention to her. Some couples may become frustrated because
they do not listen well to each other, so get out of this state of despair and
learn how to become a good listener through simple steps.
1.
Get rid of interruptions
When you talk to your wife, focus your attention entirely on her,
as we advise beginners to turn off the television and mobile phone, and if it
is possible for you to take a walk in the garden of the house, there is no
objection to that so that you do not take your eyes off of her for anything
else. Since a good listener should not be cut off from the person in front of
him, this is one of the basics of listening, in addition to helping you listen
better.
2.
Focus on what the person in front of you is saying
How many times has your wife talked to you and you didn't pay any
attention to what she said? This happened a lot, I think! Many of us are
thinking about what to have for lunch or on our unfinished to-do list. So, most
of the time, we may not listen to what the other person is saying, but all that
concerns us is our response to his words.
When you notice that your
thinking is starting to drift away from what the other person is saying,
immediately bring yourself back to the point, focus on the words this person is
saying and give them the necessary attention.
3.
Put yourself in the place of the person talking to you
It is very important to put yourself in the place of the opposite
person when your ideas conflict with his ideas, because you have to understand
his position well. This perception may change your opinion from opposition to
agreement with what he says. Listening to whoever is speaking to you is the
only way to disagree with him in opinion without clashing. Listening also
allows you to feel the other person's identity by seeing the topic from their
perspective.
4.
Stop talking
Many people never listen to someone who is speaking to them,
because they receive the conversation at the end, or they search in their minds
for the appropriate answer or response. Train yourself to remain calm when
someone is speaking in front of you. Refrain from speaking and interrupting
others. You and the person you are talking to must have enough time to say what
you have to say. So learn to wait your turn to speak.
5.
Repeat what you heard
After you give the person who is talking to you enough attention,
focus on what he is saying, and listen carefully to him, you will have to make
sure that you understood what he said correctly and repeat it out loud. If you
are not focused enough, this person will repeat what he was saying to you
again, until you understand it completely, and the person in front of you
should do the same thing with you.
6.
Respond appropriately
Marriage is the best example of this, as it is a safe haven for
spouses to express themselves. You should not be afraid to share your private
matters with your wife. There is one way to build trust and create an
environment of dialogue between you, and this method is the appropriate
response to what you hear from your wife.
For example, if she starts crying over something, do not laugh at
her, but hug her. Do not underestimate the value of your wife if she consults
you on a matter that concerns her, whether intentionally or willingly, because
you will make her frustrated with your words unless you support her.
7.
Use your body language
Your body sends signals even if you do not speak, so an effective
listener does not use facial expressions that indicate shock or boredom, but
rather uses gestures and body language to show the person in front of him that
he is interested in listening to his words. Use your body language to show your
love for the person who is talking to you, instead of negativity that may hurt
him.
8.
Practice listening skills
Listening requires training like anything else. In addition to
repeating what you hear from the person who is speaking to you, you can do
exercises that strengthen your art of listening, such as remaining in silence
for 3 minutes a day and distinguishing sounds that are familiar to you. Experts
in this field say that we should devote 60% of the conversation time to
listening and nothing else.
Suggested activities to improve listening skills
Improving listening skills is crucial for academic success and
effective communication. Here are three activities to enhance listening skills
among students:
Active Listening Exercises:
Conduct interactive exercises that focus on active listening. One
effective activity is the "Partner Share." In this activity, students
pair up and take turns sharing a short story or experience. The listener must
then summarize or repeat back what they heard to ensure understanding.
Another activity is the "Listening Journal." Assign
students to listen to a podcast, TED Talk, or a recorded lecture. Afterward,
they can write a summary, highlight key points, and reflect on their
understanding. This encourages focused and purposeful listening.
Role-Playing and Simulations:
Use role-playing scenarios to simulate real-life communication
situations. For example, students can participate in a "Job Interview
Simulation" where they take turns being the interviewer and interviewee.
The emphasis is on listening carefully to the questions and responding
appropriately.
Conduct a "Group Decision-Making Simulation" where
students work in teams to solve a problem or make a decision. Effective
listening is crucial for understanding team members' perspectives and reaching
a consensus.
Listening Comprehension Exercises:
Choose engaging audio materials such as news reports, interviews,
or story podcasts that align with the student's proficiency level. After
listening, provide comprehension questions to assess their understanding.
Incorporate "Listening Circles" where students sit in a
circle, and you play a short audio clip. Each student must share what they
heard with the person sitting next to them, creating a chain of communication.
This activity promotes attentive listening and effective communication.
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